Hello forty

Celebrating a milestone.  40 - It really is just a number but a great reason to celebrate.  Some say life begins at 40, others it is all down hill from here.  I have been doing a lot of reflecting  and reading lately.  There are some great ideas out there.  Thought I would share some of my life lessons as I look back to look forward. Bucket lists are a great idea but don't forget to look back at what you have already done and celebrate.

I came across this idea at Susannah Conway - 40 lessons from 40 years.  She has also written a piece about getting older.  An interesting read.  I discovered it through Ali Edwards site where she also talks about getting older.  I also found this gem by Nichole Heady at Papertrey Ink - thank you cards to people who have inspired me.  Definitely something that I want to do.  And also at A Holy Experience - be the gift.  Pay it forward.  

In no particular order - 40 lessons from 40 years

1 Slow down. Don't be in such hurry to move on to the next thing. Celebrate your successes and learn from  your mistakes.

2 Be you

3 Find what you love to do and do it often. That thing that you always wanted to do. Go do it

4 Make memories

5 Respect people who make time for you in their busy schedule, but love people who never look at their schedule when you need them

6 Be that kind of friend

7 Finish what you started even if that means calling it quits

8 Shine, not so that others can see you but so that through you others can see Him

9 Step out of your comfort zone. You will be surprised at just how much is waiting for you there.

10 Don't do things just because everyone else is doing them. Do it because it is right for you

11 Discover what clothing suits you and have fun getting dressed

12 Live with less. Many people already do

13 Give thanks. Someone is praying right now for the things that you take for granted

14 Find your voice and speak out

15 Just breathe

16 Be brave

17 We are all messy and in need of grace. God is not an option, He is a necessity. Don't believe that He will not give you more than you can handle. He will. It brings you to Him. It doesn't make you weak – with Him you are stronger

18 Learn to forgive.

19 Find the music that makes your soul sing. Play it loud.

20 Share your story. Chances are someone is going through the exact same thing and they needed to hear they are not alone

21 Give people the benefit of doubt. You don't know their full story. Remember you can't change someone else but you do have a choice about how you react.

22 Don't compare your backstage mess to someone elses on stage performance

23 You are already amazing

24 Do things when (or as soon as) you can. When you leave little things they turn into big things.

25 Be happy – now.

26 Leave room in the margin. 'In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps' Prov 16:9. You don't have to be in control of everything

27 Be generous. When you go from this life you can only take what you have given away.

28 Don't wait for the perfect moment. Take a moment and make it perfect

29 If you look for the extraordinary in the ordinary, you can train yourself to see it.

30 Wherever you are be there

31 Marriage isn't for me. The best thing you can do for your marriage is to turn the M around. Me into We. Do things for your spouse that they love just because. Love is a verb, it doesn't consist of gazing inwards, rather it is looking outwards together in the same direction

32 There is no need to be perfect to inspire others, let people be inspired by how you deal with your imperfections. It is not who you are that holds you back, it's what you think you are not

33 Enjoy your food. Eat healthy, try new recipes, add flavour

34 Dream big. Keep a journal

35 Having kids doesn't get any easier as they get older, it just changes. Find out what they like and who they are and grow with them.

36 Keep it simple. Use what you have. Where possible work out how to make things for yourself. It costs less and usually there is less waste.

37 Keep finding good books that you can't put down

38 Learn how to enjoy your own company. If you can't pick yourself, who else will?

39 Say no to things so that your yes is absolute

40 Do not fear the years to come – Life gets more fabulous if you let it.

I choose - October

I choose

My intentions from One Little Word for October is 'accomplish enough'.  Quite fitting really.  My intentions were to look at what I had started that needed finishing and to move ahead with new things.  I have been doing quite the opposite.  Starting new things before finishing what I need to and continually trying to catch up with what I am already doing.

Choices for October

Finish the projects and classes that I started

Make dates for social events that I have planned

Visit businesses for information about building our studio

Keep blogging

I choose - July, August, September

I choose

July was half way through and I started writing this post. 3 months later and I found the draft I had started.  I have been very absent of late.  I keep thinking that I should post a small note at the top of my blog "If I haven't been here it is because I am living"  not that I don't have things to write about.

My intentions from One Little Word for July was 'enough dreams'. For August was 'care enough'. For September was 'plan enough'.

As I dwell on all of this I can see how appropriate this is for me right now.  With travelling, all the sickness we had and busyness of life, you just knuckle down and weather the storm.  The what ifs and doubts creep in and I wonder just what I hope I have of accomplishing the day to day, let alone something bigger   There is often no room for dreaming.  I find it hard to take care of me let alone others.  I had plans just what has become of them?

Where am I at now?  Only because of what I set in motion here.  Grounded in faith I weathered the storm. What I wrote in this post  keeps me going.   Seems I am not the only one who knows this.  I caught up on blog reading and found this at Beautiful Things.  I love how when you are tuned into the voice of God you are more aware of his whisperings.

I choose - June

I choose

Only half way through the month.  I realised as I reflect on last month and look ahead to what I wanted to focus on this month, I have unintentionally achieved what I wanted to look at for this month.  It just goes to show that when you place things visibly before you they are more obvious.

My intentions from One Little Word for June is 'enough faith'. So many self help books and goal setting advice strives for a balanced life.  It was life changing when I came to the knowledge that to live fully I need to embrace the different elements of my life, not try and fit them into a certain time slot in my day or week.  In Stephen Covey's book 7 Habits of Highly Effective People he highlights the 4th Habit - Put First Things first as setting what is most important and putting it first.  To know what is important we need to look at what we centre our life on.  In this post from my series enough I touched on what that looks like for me.  Not Christ first - but Christ centred.

So I look back to look forward.  Last month's intentions will filter through to now as I continue with what enough faith looks like for me.

Choices for June

 Take part in study groups at church
Take Hello Mornings to the next level
Pray like I mean it

 Worship more than just on Sunday

I choose - May

I Choose

A change of season and I need to remember just what the cooler weather brings.  I can see why animals go into hibernation.  I have struggled to be motivated towards doing much of anything.  Combined with weekend's taken up with conferences, starting soccer and sickness I just haven't gotten to it.

I have found setting my goals each month really worth while.  I have had in mind the focus that I want to work towards.  This blog is certainly a great tool in keeping me on track..... when I write.  As I look back at April's intentions I see that one of my choices was to write the blog posts that have been waiting to be written.  I have so many ideas that I want to put here.  I need to take my own advice.  Instead of looking at all of it and doing nothing I need to look at one thing I can do and just start.  One of the best pieces of advice that I have taken from this class is the beauty in setting new choices each month.  You can look at what you put and discard it or move forward with it.  No sense beating yourself up about not achieving what you wanted.

I was able to pack away the summer things, reorganise and mostly clean the house.  I set up things for the school holidays.  They turned out quite differently though.  I have been thinking more about the plans for the studio.  It seems to be quite far down on the list.  As for setting some dates for more social events I have ideas in the pipleline.  The next thing is to actually book them in.

My intentions from One Little Word for May was 'enough play'.  I wanted to focus on having fun and enjoying time with my boys.  To do this I can see that I need to look at my fitness and am wanting to get moving more so I have the energy to keep up with the boys.  I also want to be sure that I am doing something for me.  I know that when I do it re-energises me.

Choices for May

Make dates for social events

Buy shoes suitable for walking

Use opportunities for playtime with the boys

Organise the big things so I can do the little things that matter

Get crafting at least once a week

Okay with the messy

At any given time my bench is filled with produce from the garden

As much as I would like at least the beds made I still walk out without them done

There was more to do on this day than wipe the crumbs from the table before I went out.  They stayed till the end of the day when I came home.

There's always gonna be another mountain.  I'm always gonna want to make it move.

Always gonna be an uphill battle,  sometimes I'm gonna have to lose

It ain't about how fast I get there, ain't about what's waiting on the other side. 

It's the climb

The climb - Miley Cyrus. 

The last month has been quite a climb. I have been here there and everywhere; for everyone and it's been messy. Finding yourself again in the messy is a good thing. It makes you more aware of what is good and what is right. So I didn't finish some of the things I wanted to, there is always tomorrow. What counts is how I spend my day and where I am headed, who I am doing all this for. I may get distracted by all the social media, but it leads me home to what I need to hear. While I haven't been writing here I've been listening and lived and learned. The little things have made big differences.

I read this post by Ann at A Holy Experience and this one at Allume and another at to Overflowing.  No matter what you see of others or read or think, we are all messy and in need of grace.  No matter how much you seek what is perfect you will always come up short.

So what if I was to look at all of this from a different view?

In the devotion for her book 1000 gifts, Ann Voskamp describes well how 'we elevate what we deem beautiful, endeavour to create spheres of pristine beauty and perhaps rightly so, for "what ever is good, pure, lovely, think on these things" But I wonder if maybe in the upside-down kingdom of God, what we regard as unlovely is, in Jesus, lovely.  Because somewhere, underneath the grime of this broken world, everything has the radiant fingerprints of God on it.  Seeing the world with Jesus' eyes, we have the astonishing opportunity to daily love the unlovely into loveliness.'

So my bench covered in food to be sorted - a blessing of what has been provided and what I can share

My unmade beds - extra sleep after a later night with lots of fun and laughter

The crumbs and mess on the table - a meal together and memories of treasures collected and still to be sorted

How about you?  Do you find yourself at the end of the day wondering just what you got done and was it worth it?  Are you waiting for things to be perfect before you do that thing that you have been wanting to?  What about stopping and looking at the messy and seeing it for what it really is.

I choose - April

I choose

The most significant achievement for me from my choices last month has been establishing what is enough for me in my daily routine.  I have an ideal in mind of how I want to start the day.  What actually works has been to take things in little steps.  I think I need to write more on this one.

I have put together the photos I want printed and need to do the final check before sending off the order.  Because I have had other projects on the go it hasn't been needed.  I am looking at doing it in the next week though as there are a number of photos that I want to scrapbook.

With the weather getting cooler by the day, I have also had a re-sort in my wardrobe.  It gave me a chance to pull out some of the things that I don't wear and add some new pieces to some things that mean I am now wearing them.  Again another post in the making.

I mentioned last month that I felt like I had been doing more.  What was holding me back was all the everyday things that tend to drag me down because no matter how often you do them they are back again the next day.  I feel like I have really been off my game.    I have started to work through this and will be putting together the ideas to share.

My intentions from One Little Word for April is 'Share enough'. As I have been working on the changes to my blogs I have been looking at how I want to use them.  I have also been thinking about how my word 'enough' came about.  It was not long after sharing my message that my father passed away and with Christmas, birthdays and the new year starting school among other things it is certainly time to get back together with friends.

Choices for April

Pack away things from summer

Finish cleaning the house

Set up for the school holidays

Write the blog posts that have been waiting to be written 

Put together the plans for the studio ready to start seeing what is available

Make dates for social events

I choose - March

I choose

I know, I know,  March has come and gone.  My choices for this month have been somewhat of a carry on from last month. With February being a shorter one I realised that I wanted to do more than I was able. While I thought that I would be able to get onto things that I wanted to do the change of pace with having boys in three different places has been a lot to keep up with.

I am pleased with the progress that I made with the changes to my blog and am looking forward to continuing the set up of how I want to use it.  I also joined two study groups through church and am enjoying going deeper in the word and being a part of supporting others.  Leading the team at Mainly Music has also been a big part of this month as we are setting up for the year and making changes to the session.

While I never got onto finishing the last of the projects for the Big Picture Class Home Blessings that I had taken earlier in the year, I have been completing other projects that have been in the to do pile.  This has allowed room for sorting the photos that I want to get printed.  I am really enjoying my creative time with the changes that I made to my space.

So with my intention being to do enough it seems I have been doing more.  What I realised is that I know what it is that I want to be doing.  The struggle comes in working through the other things that hold me back from doing them.

My intentions from One Little Word for March is 'I am enough'. With so many things from the media that influence my thinking about who we should be and how we should look this is something that I continue to work on.

Choices for March

Establish a good morning routine

End each day with a nightly routine

Order photos and supplies to set up my Project Life album

Re-evaluate my wardrobe

Hello Mornings

I started.  Back to school, back to routine.  Time to do what I have longed for.  To establish a good morning routine.  It sets the day.

It was a beautiful one. 

My aim was for 7.00

My journals and books ready 

and then........

while it would be awesome to be up and to study and pray {let alone exercise as is suggested},  it is enough that I am up.  It is going to take time to get to where I want to be.  While I am waiting I do the next thing.  For now that is being up by 7, reading my Word for Today, focusing on what needs to be done and what I want to get done as I start the day.  I have been reading my study book Desperate and keeping up with where the study is online.  Next is to write about it.

I keep burning the candle at the other end.  Staying up late trying to get more done.  What I realise is that to set the day up right would mean that I am able to do what I should be because I am not trying to catch up.  The start of the year is always full on with starting back to school and everyone's birthday between December and April.  Something I keep having to remind myself of.   I have lots I want to accomplish.  I can't do it all so I need to start with what is important.

I choose - February

 I Choose

Last month was all about setting up for a good year. I focused on what was happening.  Being the summer holidays it was difficult to think about getting back into routines and to make time for myself.  So what happened?  The boys start to school went really well.  With my oldest starting at a new school we had uniforms and books to be ready before starting.  It is never as easy as just getting things.  Uniforms have to be washed and named and books covered and named.  I have also taken on the leadership of Mainly Music and with changes ahead it was important to start out well.  With focus on this we are off to a great start.  In between I did in fact get my projects done for Big Picture classes.  We have also been enjoying lots of goodness from the garden.  Needless to say it has been a busy month.  Which is why I needed to be sure to stop and enjoy the moments especially with the boys.  With the fabulous weather we have been out and about and taken time to relax.

I realised as I worked my way through my choices for January that when you have the big picture in mind, the way forward happens when you do the next thing.  In the end it all comes together. When I focused on one area, things in other areas tended to get left and I was on constant catch up.  I didn't get everything I wanted done.  What I set out to do required a lot of effort.  The results though, were all worth it.

My intentions from One Little Word for February is 'I do enough'.  Holidays are always great when you don't have to be or do certain things at certain times.  Back to routine takes time.  I have really been thinking about what I really want to be doing.

Choices for February

Establish a good morning routine

End each day with a nightly routine

Revamp my blogs for the purpose that I intend to use them

Join a study group through church
Plan for training for Mainly Music

Order photos and supplies to set up my Project Life album

Complete the projects for Big Picture Classes

Clean one extra space in my house everyday

One Little Word

My word for 2013

e·nough

[ih-nuhf] 

adjective

1.adequate for the want or need; sufficient for the purpose or to satisfy desire: enough water; noise enough to wake the dead.

pronoun

2.an adequate quantity or number; sufficiency.

adverb

3.in a quantity or degree that answers a purpose or satisfies a need or desire; sufficiently.

4.fully or quite: ready enough.

After putting together my series on enough at the end of last year I wanted to carry it through and allow it to be a part of who I am.

Last year my word was define. My idea was that I would finally get to writing my mission statement and setting my goals.  To put together my project of defining me.  Yet I ended the year in a very different place.  To define means to set the meaning of and determine the boundaries of a word.  So to define me I had to strip away everything that didn't fit with me.  It meant simplifying my life.  Clearing the clutter and the unfinished projects and deciding what I really wanted to be doing and who I want to be.

I came across this verse while clearing my diary from 2012.  Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and your plans will succeed -  PROV 16:3.  After reading this post by Amanda at Always Amanda and this post at To Overflowing. I need to remember that while I have plans and dreams I always need to leave room for God to write the story.  So here is to this year and living a full life of white space and margin by discovering what is enough.

I choose - January

This year I want to be more deliberate about the choices that I make. I had ideas about what I wanted to achieve last year. Some of them happened and others are still in the dream stage. Mainly it was because I wasn't clear about where I was headed. So I am taking the class I choose at Big Picture Classes. Elise is so inspiring.  You can find her at enJOY it. Each month I will be setting up what I want to achieve in the coming month. So here we go!

Choices for January

Set up my journals for 2013

Relax and enjoy time with my boys

Set up the Mainly Music programme I am leading

Do one thing each day for my Big Picture classes

Set the boys up for starting school

Use what is growing in our garden for meal planning

To the power of three

To the power of 3

Father, Son and Holy Spirit

A car is made to run on gasoline and it would not run properly on anything else. Now God designed the human machine to run on Himself. He Himself is the fuel our spirits were designed to burn, or the food our spirits were designed to feed on. There is not any other. That is why it is just no good asking God to make us happy in our own way. God cannot give us happiness and peace apart from Himself, because it is not there. There is no such thing. CS Lewis

Whatever you think of me and what I do. It is not about me. For everything I do there is one thing I changed to make it happen and several things that I choose not to do. Since making the date for the night  I originally shared this message,  I had been so challenged about what I  shared. I had nothing else booked for that week. As it happens things changed and I had had more than I could possible imagine fitting in. That day alone I prepared for the night, went to the school cross country, visited my son's intermediate open day, and had soccer practice on top of what I already do in a day {which always seems like not much when you have a 3 year old helping}. At every turn I have met with struggle. 

But I am always reminded that He has overcome the world and I need to press on.  Phil 3:14  If God can handle eternity then I can handle today.

There is something powerful in meeting with someone and sharing the journey.  Why wait for the next big thing, inspiring speaker or programme. I believe we have what we need, we just need to access it. We as a group of women have the opportunity to do more than has been before. To define our lives not let life define us. To stand together to be enough. Confident with where we are, yet fighting for who we hope to become. And pass it on.

There is so much more but for now - enough said

but keep watching this space..........

Plus One

+1

Ever said to yourself I will do............. when I …............ but, I am not there yet. Something I always said until I discovered there is no there. There will always be something else. Life is continually changing. Even with a destination it is not about the arrival but who we become. We get so overwhelmed with everything that needs to be done we do nothing. The phrase that women can do anything has been misinterpreted as women can do everything. We can do everything................. we are supposed to do................ but not all at once.

In my previous enough posts I outlined how we need to see who we are, what we have and what we do, as enough.  God loves us just as we are but he loves us too much to leave us this way.

We all have to do lists and things we want to improve on.  What if instead of trying to do it all we chose one thing that would make a difference and do it.  I always ask myself 'how good would it feel if I ...........' 

I have been really challenged by the Faith at Home series that the church has put together. There are a number of things that I have been meaning to do. My Faith box is collecting dust, we really only say grace on occasion. So I was inspired by something I saw on the internet. A family basket that had prayer sticks and study notes and children's bibles. . Til then I had put the bibles by the childrens beds thinking we would read them more. So I put it together and put it on the table. No we didn't do anything with it. It sat. The boys asked questions. I told them what it was. We eat meals to nourish us and give us energy for living. We read the word – the bread of life to give us food for our growth as a Christian. I have been reading my word for today more. At the end of meals we have read one or two stories and studies. All from doing one thing. 

If I know where I want to go then each step I take towards it is a step in the right direction. I remind myself how good it feels to be where I want to be. As much as I love achieving something I am enjoying what happens along the way. Something my boys have taught me. Riley loves to stop and smell the roses.

You have to know where you are headed. What is your purpose?  What is your one thing? I read this post just the other day from Brave Girls Club

Dear Seeking Girl,
So much of the greatest joys in
life come from moving something out of the way so we can see what we are
intended to see. Often we focus on a problem or an issue, sometimes doing it to
ourselves, and sometimes allowing someone else to keep putting something
stressful in front of us over and over again. And then it grows so big that we
can not see everything else around it, behind it, above it, below
it.
Everything has a place. Everything has a time. Everything has a
season.
When we allow something to consume all of our thoughts, all of
our vision, all of our energy, to suck up all of our joy, all of our heart, all
of our goodness, we are not letting anything else in our life have its place,
its time or its season.
If the issue that is causing you to struggle was
written on a tiny piece of paper and you put it RIGHT in front of your eyes, it
would make it so that you could see nothing else. It wouldn’t MEAN that nothing
else was there, it would just mean that it is not in its place. Take that “piece
of paper” and put it down on a table where you can see it with everything else,
how small it is, how much surrounds it, how much bigger the sun and the sky and
everything good is, how it does not deserve as much attention from you as it is
getting.
Dear friend, beautiful girl, take that worry from in front of
your face and see the people who love you, the way things keep working out, the
way the sun rises each morning. Hear the sounds of your life, taste the tastes
of your life, remember the things you have already learned and been through.
Remember how you want to feel and where you want to be. Pick it up as needed and
deal with it as needed, but then put it back down and live your life. Life is
meant to be joyful.
You are so loved. There is a better way. Always go
where the peace is.

What change could you make that would make a big difference to how you live your life?

I am happy. Not because of my circumstances but because

I do not do this alone. 

To be continued.....

I do enough

I do enough
You have probably already heard - Take care of yourself before you can take care of anyone else and 'They grow up so fast' meaning leave what you think you need to do and do what you ought to do. Its just not always easy to just leave everything that needs to be done. While the washing will still be there tomorrow so will another couple of loads to add to it. It would be great to be able to prioritise what needs to come first and leave all the rest.  I can't do that.  I find it really hard to focus on what I am doing when there are other things to be done.  I wrote more about this in the She Will Run study - Guilt. You can read it here.

In short I have certain things that I do so I know I have done enough.  My solution is to simplify what I do so I can do what I was made to do. For every task required there is a simpler way to do it.  And there is always more to do

You do enough

Heard it all before?  

Are you saying to yourself.......

I could never..........

Its all very well for her she.......

that is just the point - the equation is I not her.

I don't think we need to learn anything new. Rather we need to acknowledge what we already know and do something with it. It is about making a start. Even if a little imperfect.